1.) What’s your favorite song? My all-time favorite song is Vancouver Sleep Clinic’s Ambient Version/Cover of the song “Yellow”. Outside of Gregorian Chant or Sacred Polyphony, nothing has touched the crevices of my soul the way Vancouver Sleep Clinic has; my favorite album is Onward to Zion. The title of that album alone reminds me of the Book of the Apocalypse’s New Jerusalem and Our Lord finding His permanent dwelling in Zion once the Jews convert to Catholicism with the defeat of anti-Christ and the miracles wrought by Elijah and Henoch. Singer Tim Bettinson’s lyrics often remind me of Our Holy Father John of the Cross’ deep style of heart wrenching poetry and his voice is simply haunting. How I would imagine Our Lord’s Voice.
2.) What’s your favorite film? Passion of the Christ, Lord of the Rings Trilogy (ONLY the extended editions, of course) and 1944’s Gaslight (in that order).
ps. Never trust people who hate Frodo and say Sam is the only hero (Frodo is my all-time favorite). These are the same people who don’t understand cloistered life, and with Martha ask the Mary’s to get up and serve. But who is there to serve Our Lord directly? Our Lord said Mary chose the better portion, right? But this does not also mean that Martha and Mary did not work together, nor that they didn’t need each other. On the contrary, Mary couldn’t sit at Our Lord’s feet without Martha’s service, but Martha would not have had the grace that comes from Mary’s prayer, to serve. I didn’t mean to compare Sam and Frodo to Martha and Mary, but there you have it! Sam could not have carried the ring and thus NEEDED Frodo, but Frodo could not have done it WITHOUT Sam. Like the Magdalen and Martha, their vocations are powerful when in perfect harmony. You can’t make Sam a hero by tearing down Frodo. Get off it!
pps. I am such a romantic at heart, but also so drawn to Joan of Arc type warrior zeal. One of the finest explanations I have heard about genuine masculinity found in Lord of the Rings character Aragorn, reminded me of Our Lord. The Youtube channel Cinema Therapy said: “a man can still write poetry and decapitate orcs; they don’t have to be mutually exclusive” or “Aragorn is so comfortable in his masculinity that he is fine with singing at his own coronation with rose petals falling all around him” (please note Gimli’s priceless reaction to the petals). THIS. That is Our Lord in a nutshell. His tenderness does not lessen His masculinity; if anything, it makes Him more masculine. The problem we have today is men are either one or the other: too macho… or gay😒.
3.) What’s your favorite recreational book(s)? Chronicles of Narnia, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, The Hunger Games Trilogy (https://crisismagazine.com/opinion/eucharistic-symbolism-hunger-games) Jane Austen novels, and anything Jane Austen themed.
Favorite Jane Austen books in order:
1.) Persuasion. I describe this book in Jane Austen’s phrase as “loveliness itself”.
2.) Pride and Prejudice. Another “loveliness itself” book.
3.) Northanger Abbey. This book is lighthearted, fun and simply delightful. It is a satire and comedy; to use Austen’s phrase, this story is a “happy thought indeed!” However, if you are new to this story, for first time readers I recommend the audible adaptation by Anna Lee, where actors play the parts and you can hear tea sets clanking in the background, fire crackling and carriages bustling. It really makes the reader feel like they are IN the story. Anna Lee has these adaptations for all of Austen’s work on audible under “the Jane Austen Collection” and they make me smile.
4.) Sense and Sensibility. The valuable lessons in this book are endless. I cannot exactly pinpoint what I love about it, but it is a gem.
5.) Emma. Believe it or not but Emma, a known favorite to many, is one of my least favorites. To use another one of Austen’s expressions, it is “barely tolerable I suppose” to read. There are some wonderful quotes and valuable lessons, but the book simply does not grab my attention like the others. It’s quite lengthy, and the end does not feel worth the read. BBC came out with excellent adaptations, however!
6.) I am not including Mansfield Park on the list, because that book was hard enough to read one time; I only read it to say I have gone through all six of Jane Austen’s novels, but every moment was a torment. I tried it a few times more to see if it would be any better, but it was simply unbearable and cringeworthy. Do not put yourself through that! It is not redemptive suffering by any means. And to bring home my Austen expressions, it is “the last book in the world I could ever be prevailed upon to read.” But you know what I do RECOMMEND? It’s a spin off by a different author who changed the outcome of the story, and I can very much say that if Jane Austen would have listened to her sister and chose this ending, the book would have been my second favorite after Persuasion. What Austen was thinking I will never know, but this below adaptation is a treat:
I also recommend the Diaries of the Jane Austen Heroes written by Amanda Grange; she writes in the true Jane Austen wit and spirit, and I oftentimes prefer her versions to Austen’s (sorry Jane)!
Podcast on one of my favorite Jane Austen Heroine’s:
Favorite Blog Post on Jane Austen:
https://maryssecretary.com/2022/09/12/how-our-lord-makes-himself-irresistible/
4.) Favorite Saints: Outside of Mary, Saint Joseph and Saint Michael, who, I put on a totally different level, I don’t have a favorite saint. Let me explain. I love them all. I have created therefore a sort of hierarchy in my mind beginning with the
1.) Apostles,
2.) Prophets,
3.) Carmelites ,
4.) And ALL the angels and saints.
Though Mary is set apart from the rest, if I could choose only one, it would be Mary without a moment’s hesitation, every time. She rules my heart. But directly following Her, my go to are always going to be Saints Joseph and Michael who are the official guardians and protectors of Ecclesia Romana and the New Jerusalem.
5.) What Bible do you use? Latin Vulgate Douay Rheims.
6.) What Latin Mass Missal do I use? PRE-1962 Saint Andrew’s Missal. This Missal has taught me more about my faith than I can express. It’s truly like a history book. I am saddened to say that the Missals that came after 1962 are watered down and lacking in substance. One only needs to put the Saint Andrew’s Missal beside the 1962’s to see the tragic difference (yes, tragic is the word). Yes, they are on the pricier side, but can we really put a price on the beauties, riches and glories of our faith? In all seriousness, if you shop around, you can find good deals!
7.) Do I attend the Novus Ordo? I no longer attend the Bogus Ordo at all, nor the use of Nervous DisORDOr Sacraments. My Baptism, First Holy Communion and Confirmation were all through the New Mass Rites, and while I believe they are valid (for now), but Illicit (unlawful), I believe along with Archbishop Carlo Maria Vigano that there is only ONE Roman Rite, that the New Mass must be permanently abolished, and Vatican II must be declared a failed Council. I believe priests ordained in the New Mass are valid priests but MUST switch over to celebrating ONLY the Latin Mass of the Apostles without fear and without compromise. Now is no time for weakness and effeminacy in the priesthood, but zeal and trust in God and His Holy Mother to do the right thing always knowing Our Lord will provide and reward those most liberally for choosing truth over compromise. For choosing courage over fear; faith over sinful freemasonic obedience. BE MEN, MEN!
https://maryssecretary.com/2022/08/02/what-it-actually-means-to-be-valid-yet-illicit/
8.) What Office do you pray? I knew nothing of the Divine Office before I entered Carmel, but my first and only experience has been using the 1938 four volume set of the Carmelite Rite. I still use them currently, but to those who are not Carmelite, I highly recommend, just like PRE 1962 Missals, the PRE 1962 Breviaries. They are typically VERY hard to find and of course expensive because they are so rare, but I hope that when Holy Mother Church is restored with the triumph of Mary’s Heart, all her sacred books will be restored as well:
https://www.divinumofficium.com/cgi-bin/horas/officium.pl
9.) Favorite Past Times? I LOVE singing, writing and public speaking (even though the third is NEVER (well, almost never) done by a hermit). Though I am a simple woman, no priest, nor should women EVER be priests (I know my place), I find myself judging many, many, MANY members of the clergy with the way they deliver their sermons and homilies. You know that one quote about how protestants go for the sermon, whereas we Catholics go DESPITE the sermon?
Yeah… of course, the main difference is we are indeed there for the Holy Sacrifice, NOT the homily, but would not it be nice if every priest could preach with the fire, elegance and zeal of Saint Paul? Some homilies are just a flat-out wet blanket. I can honestly count on my hand, throughout the course of my entire life (this is no hyperbole) how many times I heard a homily and said, “that was the best I had ever heard”, because it rarely, if at all, happens. How can I say this charitably? Most homilies are boring and lack fire. Especially when priests mention Mary; It’s so surface level and hardly ever reaches the abyss of Her rich interior.
Even Therese lamented that many priests did not preach Mary accurately and she found herself judging the homily and said if she were a man and a priest, she herself would delight in preaching on the glories of Mary. Short story long, I often find myself sitting there, listening to the priest, saying to myself, “If I were him, this is how I would have delivered the homily. This is what I would have talked about etc.” But alas! God made me a wretched woman and so, I must content myself with silently judging. A comedian once joked and said the number one thing many people feared the most was public speaking, and death was number two. He laughingly said, “death was NUMBER TWO?”. He went onto say a large percentage would rather be in the casket than giving the eulogy. I personally would love to give some sort of epic speech on Mary and then die. Why not both? A girl can dream!
10.) What’s your favorite quote? C.S. Lewis:
My prayer is that when I die, all of hell rejoices that I am out of the fight.
11.) If you’re not shy how on earth can you identify as an introvert? (Eye Roll). Easy. Introversion is not anything that needs to be overcome, nor does it have anything to do with being outgoing or shy. Introverts get their energy from being alone and do not need validation from others, while extroweirdos (er… extroverts) get their energy from others and oftentimes need validation from people. Introverts really do make the best contemplatives. This does not mean that extroverts can’t be so.
Extroverts can thrive in a cloister that has twice a day recreations, and that part of the community horarium will generally give them their fill of extrovert “supply”, while introverts often look at the clock counting down the hour until siesta (that was definitely me). I have been asked, “don’t you ever get lonely?” and while no one can never say “never” with that question, I can honestly say I felt lonelier at recreation than I ever did in solitude. In solitude, with Elizabeth of the Trinity, to be alone with the Alone, is where… I never, well, almost never, feel alone. “I just want to be alone with Someone (God) Who wants to be alone.” Introvert memes are definitely my favorite.
People, Catholics included, need to cease attacking introverts or seeing their own “supply” of energy as something that needs to be fixed, because I have not a doubt in my mind that Jesus, Mary and Joseph were all introverts, Why? Because they drew their energy not from men, but the Father; and for Mary and Joseph, they gained it perfectly from their Divine Son, God Himself, Who walked in their Midst and lived under their sacred roof. One of my favorite memes of Our Lord is Him kneeling down saying, “are You there, God? It’s Me, You”. My ringtone before entering Carmel was the 80’s song, “Who Can It Be Now?” 1.) because it was funny to have the phone ring and “who can it be now?” come on 2.) the lyrics are made for introverts:
“Who can it be knocking at my door?[I mean this, introverts don’t like surprise knocks at the door; their heart skips a beat]
Make no sound, tip-toe across the floor [Yep]
If he hears, he’ll knock all day [as quiet as possible, looks through the peek hole]
I’ll be trapped and here I’ll have to stay [wasn’t planning on leaving anyways, since hermits don’t do that, except for Mass, confession and the occasional vitamin C of being outdoors]
I’ve done no harm, I keep to myself [seriously].
There’s nothing wrong with my state of mental health [nope].”
I would say the most common misconception about outgoing introverts, and I can say this from my own personal experience, is many assume I am an extrovert because I am cheerful and will engage in a conversation with someone. If one really ponders this, it’s actually insulting to introverts. If myself, or any other introvert is labeled an extrovert for merely being charitable, as any Catholic should by engaging in conversation with charity, this is where common sense just needs to enter the scene.
Introverts can be funny, outgoing and charming, but we will not go out of our way to strike up the conversation unless someone else does, because we do not like small talk (neither did Our Lord; the Gospels can attest to that). The perfect example I can give is when I have been on an airplane. I will smile politely at my neighbor or mouth a simple hello, but unless they start the conversation, I will keep my silence. I always see the moments of Divine Providence if my neighbor begins speaking to me on the plane, because then I will see how it’s not my will, but God’s to evangelize through words.
I chuckled when Matt joked and said not all introverts spend their time as hermits in the woods, or something along those lines, and I thought… muwaha. Walsh makes an excellent point with how the chaotic world that does not understand silence, but often runs from it, are the very people who are typically extroverts (and I do not say this to knock extroverts, because there isn’t anything wrong with extroverts or introverts) and are the people who say that extroverts are the normal people and introverts needs to be fixed. If I may be so bold here, I also believe being an introvert is having the “better portion” that Our Lord gave to the Magdalen (yes, I believe it’s a gift) because Martha gained her energy through service, while Mary gained hers through solitude.
Church history accounts for this, because the Magdalen lived the rest of her days as a hermit in a cave in France, after the Resurrection, while Martha began a community of virgins. Quite a number of holy women found at the foot of the cross became hermits, actually! Did they need to be fixed? On the contrary, they were given the choicest gift of heaven: heaven on earth. I think extroverts automatically label introverts as uncharitable for not needing validation through others to feel secure, but that could also be linked to their own insecurity of recognizing in themselves the fear of going to God directly.
Our Holy Mother Teresa understood when Our Lord affirmed for her where she would get her “validation”, and that was “no longer conversing with men, but with angels.” I had a man once tell me I was on the wrong path because no one should be a hermit, and he did not know how to reply when I said that the Church has the calling listed in Canon Law: Canon Law 603 to be precise. Not to mention some of our Church’s greatest saints having been hermits and great Popes saying how the Church “relies on her anchorites in times of turmoil.” I don’t know about you, but sign me up!
12.) Most eye-opening lesson these last few years? It’s this:
If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best.”
Our Holy Mother Teresa knew what she was talking about when she said, “all things are passing, Jesus alone suffices [and Mary😎].” I have seen how friendships are so fragile and how many show their true colors in adversity. Whether that be my stance on Jorge Bergoglio, the Latin Mass or when I experienced different forms of hardship at the hands of narcissists, nay, even religious narcissists in the priesthood or religious life. Many did not see me at my full wingspan, because many also forget that our journey to union with God is a process. But you know what? I am so glad that God has allowed me to experience the pain He must have felt in seeing His own friends, His apostles, flee from His sight when His Passion began, because it has indeed taught me to be more compassionate toward other’s sorrows, to set boundaries, discern one’s character before letting them in and to also do all that while still keeping charity burning in my heart. I am learning to have a proper balance of self-worth and self- forgetfulness, but to cease with the self-hatred.
At Mass when Our Lord says, “hoc est enim corpus meum” and later with… “which shall be shed for YOU”, personally, I see that I must be worth something if we cost so much in value to the Son of God to give up His life for us, the Church. In short, meh, if you want to be my friend, great. If you do not, great. I am learning to simply kick up the dust because my true friends and family belong in the heavenly court and never have I experienced charity and constancy be so what it ought to be with them at my side. Your opinion of me does not lower my value in God’s eyes (second greatest lesson). I only feel lonely when I am isolated from the Truth (Capital “T”); whether that be in thought or opinion. Thomas Aquinas was right when he said there was nothing to be more prized on EARTH than true friendship. Why? Because it’s a rare gem, and seldom found among today’s present Church Militant (sadly). Nonetheless, I am so blessed to be able to at least count on my hands the friends and family Our Lady has kept in my life as wheat, and I am also so grateful for the one’s She weeded out as chaff. Who wants chaff? Not I, pray!
13.) Favorite Book in the Bible? Book of the Apocalypse; you know, the super complex and hard to understand manual for our time:
14.) Favorite Marian Apparition? Our Lady of Fatima. Another message for OUR times.
15.) Favorite Marian titles? Our Lady of Seven Sorrows, Mater Ecclesiae and Stella Matutina.
16.) Why should women never be priests or deacons? I have heard the absolute best explanation ever told, about why women should never be priests, by Father Paul Kramer. Kramer pointed out how when the priest is acting in persona Christi, notice how he does not say, “this is Christ’s Body”, nor does he mean, “this is Father Kramer’s body”, but “this is MY Body”. It is truly the priest acting in the person of Christ throughout the entire Mass, and since Christ is the Bridegroom of Holy Mother Church, and the Holy Sacrifice of the Latin Mass is the Marriage Supper of the Lamb, IT IS A MARRIAGE BETWEEN MAN AND WOMAN: Our Lord and His bride, the Church. Father Kramer said for it to be a woman priest would truly make it a sort of warped lesbian union. NAY. Over my dead body 🤢🤮.
17.) Do I believe Lucia, Fatima Visionary and defender of Mary, was replaced with an imposter? 100% I do. In 2017, Dr. Peter E. Chojnowski (click button in the menu bar titled “Sister Lucy Truth” at the top of the screen) began a official investigation on this matter. Below is a snippet of what he had to say about the matter:
Sister Lucy dos Santos of Fatima and the Woman Who Replaced Her
“We at Sister Lucy Truth publicly declare that based on the evidence presented here, we have found it to be morally and scientifically certain that the woman portrayed to the world as “Sister Lucy,” from her first public appearance on May 13, 1967 to her death on February 13, 2005, was not the same person as Sister Lucy, Seer of Fatima and Visionary who predicted the Miracle of the Sun on October 13, 1917.
This, one of the greatest frauds in the history of the Church, was discovered through the use of the most sophisticated facial recognition programs available, along with the accumulated testimony of plastic surgeons, orthodontists, forensic artists, private investigators, handwriting analysts, and facial recognition experts. Due to the availability of hundreds of photos of “Sister Lucy” on the internet and in authoritative biographies, this case of substitution, fraud, and stolen identity has been able to be uncovered and analyzed. Without the judgment of the best and most relevant professionals available, we would not be making this grave accusation and presenting this charge. We will continue to accumulate and post on this site new studies and research concerning this investigation as they are produced and published. All of the names of the relevant experts shall be published along with their professional findings. The truth of the disappearance of the true Sister Lucy and the identity of the imposter who took her place shall be placed before an internationally based private investigator who will investigate and solve the case.”
The fraud has been identified and named. We charge the highest officials in the Vatican with conspiracy to perpetuate and conceal the substitution of Sister Lucy dos Santos of Fatima with an as yet unknown Imposter.
Justice for the Real Sister Lucia (AND the fake one 👀)
Fervent Catholics are in denial about this issue; perhaps a result of the scandal and the can of worms it will open, so they willfully block it out and turn the other cheek. This again is linked to sloth and effeminacy. They will not even look at the evidence. I once showed my Mom, who is not a practicing Catholic, who would be unbiased and never knew anything about Lucia, the two photos pictured above, and I asked her, “do you think this is the same person?” She so memorably said, “NO, not at all. Why? ARE THEY?” Her answer proved to me how Catholics have been so easily duped while non- Catholics see through it all. Funny how that works. “It is usually uncomfortable to be right” as well as difficult to speak the truth when one must do it alone without support from Church authority or even the flock for that matter. The Church is FILLED with cowards and those who accept compromise, as Our Lady of Akita forewarned. What this issue of an imposter Sister Lucia does is it exposes the “deep church”. Many would very reasonably ask, “but why replace Lucia”, right? This all goes back to the fact that they were not ONLY after Lucia, but above all, they were after Our Lady and the Trinity, because Mary Herself warned us THROUGH Lucia, Francisco and Jacinta what was shortly to come to pass.
With Lucia alive, there was no way she would have stood for the changes of the Mass, changes that Pope Pius XII called a “suicide” nor an “evil Council” that Father Gruner said was part of Our Lady of Fatima’s warnings. A Council that led Padre Pio to exclaim, “for pity’s sake end the Council quickly”, and a New Mass that Pio also received special permission NOT to celebrate. Not only did he not celebrate it, but he died just months before it was promulgated. Like the three seers, Our Lady revealed to him the contents of the Third Secret FOUR YEARS before She revealed it to the seers. Padre Pio knew that the Church, like her Bridegroom, would suffer a “passion”, and this is what concerned him the most. I find it ironic how many New Mass Catholics LOVE Padre Pio so conveniently do not know these details to his story…
When the Book of the Apocalypse says that The New Jerusalem will come down out of heaven, we Catholics through Church Fathers KNOW that a Biblical “great reset” is coming. This will happen shortly after the death of Elijah, Henoch and Anti-Christ. Also, the death and final passion of Holy Mother Church as predicted in the catechism, but in order for her “resurrection” to take place, she must “die”, so Mary’s Heart can triumph in her, and thus be resurrected. Anti-Christ is the puppet and “mask” of Satan, while Holy Mother Church is the symbol and mirror of Mary. Anti-Christ’s “reward” for having been made a “prince” of the world for a short time is an eternity of hell fire, but Holy Mother Church’s reward will be great- very great- for having been made a spectacle to the world, but the apple of God’s eye! Remember this when people tell you that Mary’s triumph comes BEFORE anti-Christ. What a load of garbage!
WHAT KIND OF TRIUMPH WOULD THAT BE IF ANTI-CHRIST CAME AFTER? That would mean that She did not really crush the head of the serpent, but sort of kicked him aside for a bit. That is no triumph for Mary; that is an insult to Her. That is total “fake news”. The REAL Sister Lucia of Fatima said that the devil is in the mood for engaging in the decisive battle against the Virgin, and the decisive battle is ONE battle. Where one side will be victorious and the other will suffer defeat. WE MUST NOW CHOOSE SIDES. We are either for God or for the devil, she said. The name “Jerusalem” means “they will see WHOLENESS or COMPLETENESS”. We also see how it means city of PEACE. What did Our Lady of Fatima promise? AN ERA OF PEACE. Wholeness, restoration and completeness will ONLY happen in Holy Mother Church with her liturgy, dogmas and doctrine restored WITH the triumph of Mary’s Heart, Whose time is now. Her triumph is not before anti-Christ; it’s a triumph OVER anti-Christ.
18.) Why are you so obsessed with death? Let’s consider the words of Saint Therese to some of her Carmelite sisters:
Sister: ‘We do not yet know of what disease you will die’.
Therese: ‘But’, she answered, ‘I shall die of death! Did not God tell Adam of what he would die when He said to him: Thou shalt die of death?’
Sisters: ‘Then death will come to fetch you?’
Therese: ‘No, not death, but the Good God. Death is not, as pictures tell us, a phantom, a horrid spectre. The Catechism says that it is the separation of soul and body—no more! Well, I do not fear a separation which will unite me for ever to God’.
She firmly believed that death would unite her and not separate. It would be an eternal union with God. Death entered the world with sin–we were not meant to die before the fall. With that, “when time rolls me around, give my word to the grave diggers; I’m just passing through”:
19.) What’s your temperament? Melancholic. Personality? Sanguine. How can those two be combined? Great question. Who knows?
20.) Do I think Jorge Mario Bergoglio is a fake pope, fraud and usurper? You already know the answer to that question. Does that make me a sedevacantist? Nope. But it does make me a 2023+ interregnumist😏.
Another Favorite Song:
Mary's Secretary 
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